Is there more to learn than just the language? How culture plays a role
(Just an apology for the font colors. I'm not sure why it won't go back to normal.)
What is Culture?
From Merriam-Webster (https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/culture):
Culture - the customary beliefs, social forms, and material traits of a racial, religious, or social group
Now this is only one of the several definitions they give, but it was the best one for our discussion today.
Here are a few questions for you:
1. Can you learn a language and speak with native speakers without learning about their culture?
2. Do we ever need to learn cultural norms even to meet with speakers of our own native language?
3. How do we go about learning these cultural rules and social forms?
4. What happens when there's a "cultural breakdown"?
5. Are we pretending to be someone else if we follow another group's cultural norms or is it better to assimilate?
Now, I am not even going to pretend like I have any of these answers for you. But let's talk about it for a bit.
For me, in my experiences, I've found it is very difficult to speak with a group of people in their native language without learning anything about their culture. On a 1:1 basis, it is a little bit easier, because the other person might be trying to modify their behavior to fit your culture as well. Here's an example where it can get weird:
Different countries have different ways of greeting people. In the U.S., it is typical to give a handshake when meeting both men or women. But this can change even between families. In some families, it's normal to go around and give a hug to everyone when you arrive. In some families, you might just wave to everyone and that's enough. In some cultures, you give everyone a kiss on the cheek, but maybe not the males. Sometimes when I am getting together with Luis' family, what I end up doing just depends on the day and how I'm feeling. I know that's probably not the best way to go, but his family knows me pretty well at this point. But also, sometimes when there's someone there that I haven't met, and they see I am very white, and don't know if I speak any Spanish or practice any of the Colombian social norms, it can get awkward. I can see them thinking, "Do I speak Spanish? Do I go for the cheek kiss or the handshake? Do I just ignore her until someone else introduces us?" Sometimes in this scenario, I will just make the decision and start talking or choose a greeting. Other times, I might also be unsure of what to do.
Now this is just one example of a cultural norm where things can get sticky. You could also think about how do we dress, what time can we leave, who can you talk to, what can you talk about, and oh, the food! That is a huge one, and is always a big challenge for me because I have so many diet restrictions for my health. Food and culture could probably be a post in itself.
Here's an example of a cultural norm you might not think about. The other day, a friend of mine was telling me about a social rule in China. He said that if you are interested in someone at your church, it is not appropriate to go up and talk to that person directly. It is best to talk to the pastor about your interest for the person, and he will speak to that person for you, and let you know if they are interested, and if things can move forward. This is something I never would have thought of (not that I am looking for dates in Chinese churches very often), but it is just something you learn along the way!
So how do we go about learning all of these little cultural rules? And what happens when we don't follow them?
I always wonder this myself. Am I coming off as rude if I don't go and greet everyone in the room? Or do people kind of accept it because they know I come from a different background? I think it may be related to what we want to get out of the experience. And this happens in even situations where you think everyone might follow the same cultural norms as you, to find that... Oh, people think and live in different ways. I guess if you want to feel more accepted and more involved in a group, it's probably a good idea to adopt some of those cultural norms. I feel like there may be a line where you can go overboard. I'll have to ask around and see what people think about that.
I think in order to learn all of these small details, you could possibly learn about some of them through online research. You could also directly ask a friend from this target group you want to spend time with. Another way might be to watch T.V./movies with people from that country, but be careful with that, because T.V. shows and movies are not real. Many people have asked me about American culture based on movies they've seen, and I have to tell them that what they've thought is just simply not true. So definitely be careful with that one. I think the best way to learn is through experience. You may end up in some awkward situations, or experience some "cultural breakdown," but that is how you learn, and if you're meeting nice people, this probably won't deter them from meeting up with you again.
Please leave a comment below about an experience you've had meeting with someone from a different cultural background. Did you have any awkward moments? Did anyone come off as rude? Or maybe overly nice? What do you think is important to think about when meeting new people from a different cultural background? I'd love to know what you think!
Culture - the customary beliefs, social forms, and material traits of a racial, religious, or social group
Now this is only one of the several definitions they give, but it was the best one for our discussion today.
Here are a few questions for you:
1. Can you learn a language and speak with native speakers without learning about their culture?
2. Do we ever need to learn cultural norms even to meet with speakers of our own native language?
3. How do we go about learning these cultural rules and social forms?
4. What happens when there's a "cultural breakdown"?
5. Are we pretending to be someone else if we follow another group's cultural norms or is it better to assimilate?
Now, I am not even going to pretend like I have any of these answers for you. But let's talk about it for a bit.
For me, in my experiences, I've found it is very difficult to speak with a group of people in their native language without learning anything about their culture. On a 1:1 basis, it is a little bit easier, because the other person might be trying to modify their behavior to fit your culture as well. Here's an example where it can get weird:
Different countries have different ways of greeting people. In the U.S., it is typical to give a handshake when meeting both men or women. But this can change even between families. In some families, it's normal to go around and give a hug to everyone when you arrive. In some families, you might just wave to everyone and that's enough. In some cultures, you give everyone a kiss on the cheek, but maybe not the males. Sometimes when I am getting together with Luis' family, what I end up doing just depends on the day and how I'm feeling. I know that's probably not the best way to go, but his family knows me pretty well at this point. But also, sometimes when there's someone there that I haven't met, and they see I am very white, and don't know if I speak any Spanish or practice any of the Colombian social norms, it can get awkward. I can see them thinking, "Do I speak Spanish? Do I go for the cheek kiss or the handshake? Do I just ignore her until someone else introduces us?" Sometimes in this scenario, I will just make the decision and start talking or choose a greeting. Other times, I might also be unsure of what to do.
Now this is just one example of a cultural norm where things can get sticky. You could also think about how do we dress, what time can we leave, who can you talk to, what can you talk about, and oh, the food! That is a huge one, and is always a big challenge for me because I have so many diet restrictions for my health. Food and culture could probably be a post in itself.
Here's an example of a cultural norm you might not think about. The other day, a friend of mine was telling me about a social rule in China. He said that if you are interested in someone at your church, it is not appropriate to go up and talk to that person directly. It is best to talk to the pastor about your interest for the person, and he will speak to that person for you, and let you know if they are interested, and if things can move forward. This is something I never would have thought of (not that I am looking for dates in Chinese churches very often), but it is just something you learn along the way!
So how do we go about learning all of these little cultural rules? And what happens when we don't follow them?
I always wonder this myself. Am I coming off as rude if I don't go and greet everyone in the room? Or do people kind of accept it because they know I come from a different background? I think it may be related to what we want to get out of the experience. And this happens in even situations where you think everyone might follow the same cultural norms as you, to find that... Oh, people think and live in different ways. I guess if you want to feel more accepted and more involved in a group, it's probably a good idea to adopt some of those cultural norms. I feel like there may be a line where you can go overboard. I'll have to ask around and see what people think about that.
I think in order to learn all of these small details, you could possibly learn about some of them through online research. You could also directly ask a friend from this target group you want to spend time with. Another way might be to watch T.V./movies with people from that country, but be careful with that, because T.V. shows and movies are not real. Many people have asked me about American culture based on movies they've seen, and I have to tell them that what they've thought is just simply not true. So definitely be careful with that one. I think the best way to learn is through experience. You may end up in some awkward situations, or experience some "cultural breakdown," but that is how you learn, and if you're meeting nice people, this probably won't deter them from meeting up with you again.
Please leave a comment below about an experience you've had meeting with someone from a different cultural background. Did you have any awkward moments? Did anyone come off as rude? Or maybe overly nice? What do you think is important to think about when meeting new people from a different cultural background? I'd love to know what you think!
Comments
Post a Comment